Looking Down the Barrel of a Gun featuring Rachel Williams

Transcript

Rob Dwyer (00:02.821)
Rachel Williams, thank you for being Next in Queue. How are you today?

Rachel Williams (00:07.834)
I am wonderful and I'm so grateful that you have me. I'm excited for your conversation today.

Rob Dwyer (00:12.677)
Well, I am as well. We are going to be talking about designed resilience. And I love this concept. But before we get into that, let's learn a little bit about you. Tell the audience kind of who you are and what you've been up to.

Rachel Williams (00:34.682)
Definitely. Well, my name is Rachel Williams as you introduced me. I am a fourth generation Texan. My family has been here since before anything was here. Everything when we look around we say that used to be pasture for generations in my family. I am the wife of an Army combat veteran and we have a dog Hazel who we love together. We live in East Texas.

Rob Dwyer (00:47.205)
Ha ha ha.

Rachel Williams (01:00.538)
and on Cedar Creek Lake, which is just a little reservoir that feeds Fort Worth. And I have been professionally involved in communication. So I say I talk to people about things and I've worked for international companies, I've worked a lot in healthcare, I've done some national traveling with my work and so it's just been a great way to meet people and talk to them about things.

Rob Dwyer (01:28.453)
Talk to people about things is kind of the perfect thing to do when I need a guest. And so I'm glad that you talk to people about things and that's exactly what we're going to do. You know, you and I met recently and you mentioned that at one point in your career, you kind of were faced with some challenges and someone in your life was pretty surprised about.

the way that you lived up to those challenges. Can you kind of set the stage with that story and then we'll talk more specifically about design resilience?

Rachel Williams (02:09.562)
Absolutely. I think anybody in the workforce now knows that there's a level of unpredictability about it. You see on social media networks about layoffs happening and things like that, but you never think it's going to happen to you. And that's exactly the position I was in. I was in a leadership position, managing sales, marketing, and client success. And just like any business, we had our ups and downs, and I just thought we were working through them.

until one day I got surprised with the information that I was going to be released from the company. And I am a person who has been always very achievement oriented. What I did for work and the people that I served at work were a big part of my personality. And so being completely surprised, one gave me grace. I didn't do anything and embarrassed myself because I was so in shock that it happened.

but it also completely changed what my day -to -day life looked like. Everything from when I went to bed to the clothes that I picked from a day -to -day basis. And so there were a lot of adjustments that came as a result of this completely unexpected change in my work life and my personal life.

Rob Dwyer (03:28.389)
Yeah, I think that often when we are faced with change, we are unprepared and people talk about change management, right? That's a thing in corporate America. I've studied change management, change communication, but preparing for the inevitability of change ahead of time.

personal life so that When it comes because it's typically unexpected That you can navigate it much more confidently That's really what we're going to talk about and so as you explained it to me There are five pillars that go into this. So so let's talk about the first pillar Self -concept, what does that mean?

Rachel Williams (04:27.514)
So when I was coming through this change that was so impactful to me personally, because it messed with my identity, and you know, who I would like, people would ask, what do you do? And I'm FUNemployed? Like, you know, I had to kind of change my little elevator pitch about who I was. And so I realized that I was leaning heavily when I was...

Rob Dwyer (04:46.277)
hahahaha

Rachel Williams (04:55.834)
talking to people who didn't know my situation or didn't realize it had changed on this idea that I have the self -concept of being able to successfully navigate the events of my life. And that can mean both positive and negative. So I believed about myself that I can go through really rough things, really awesome things, and come out the next day and continue to attack life again. And...

reminding myself that I have a hundred percent success rate in navigating those things. And that as long as I get up and continue to breathe and continue to move, that that record is not going to change. I knew that I had a place to settle as I was figuring out my next steps. And the reason it's important is because with a, maybe a less confident or a negative self concept,

You have this belief that there's something out there that's bigger than you that will bowl you over that can take you down. And that makes a level of uncertainty. That's a lot more difficult to negotiate. So, in one of my previous roles, I worked with emergency medical services. So fire and EMS people. And that group will teach you that there is no crisis, but imminent death. If you're not about to physically expire.

you can make it through. And so carrying that realization, it's different than self -worth. It's different than self -esteem. Those sometimes, if you're a person who lacks those things, those can be a farther journey to take. But almost everyone who is breathing and living right now can say, yes, I have successfully navigated 100 % of the situations in my life.

Rob Dwyer (06:26.405)
Yeah.

Rachel Williams (06:53.946)
And I can rely on that when unexpected change comes because I know that my record will stay the same.

Rob Dwyer (07:00.805)
Yeah, I like to think of it sometimes as just the idea of whether it's one person or a couple, right? We'll figure it out. We'll figure it out. There's a lot of still uncertainty available within that because it's not, I have this plan, this is the plan we're going to follow. It's more about just, I'm...

Rachel Williams (07:14.394)
Yes. Yes. Yes.

Rob Dwyer (07:30.565)
I know I can count on myself to navigate this. And I think that is incredibly important, yet at the same time can be challenging. Sometimes we don't, even if I know, hey, I'm still here. I've made it through all the challenges that life has presented to me. It's easy to forget that when you're faced with something that is.

very new and does seem incredibly different than what you faced before. How do you go about that reminder piece? Is that like a daily mantra? What do you do to reflect on that?

Rachel Williams (08:17.882)
Couple of things. The first is I built a meditation practice and that may sound super woo woo, but mine really isn't. It started with a timer on my phone and when I would breathe in, in my brain saying in and when I would breathe out and say out. And anything else started to come to mind because one of the things I found that I kind of had to...

put a stop to as I was navigating this change is intrusive thinking. Those records on repeat that come up now that my insecurity has been triggered. And so the meditation piece was helping me just to break that for a period of five or 10 minutes. So maybe I, you know, I wake up in a fine mood, but as I'm going through my morning, I'm thinking about how I'm not getting ready for work and how I'm not.

Rob Dwyer (08:50.213)
Mm -hmm.

Rachel Williams (09:12.73)
valuable and how I'm not creating a difference for anybody. And so having a very simple, just, okay, I'm going to sit still and close my eyes. And I'm going to say in and out as I breathe and really grounding into my body, help to break that pattern because it does tend to be an increasing speed spiral. and so when, when your thoughts kind of overwhelm you, that's something that I've used. and I'm going to,

touch a little bit on another of the pillars of community, because that's another place that really helped me line back up. My community of my very close inner circle, as I would say things when my thoughts would run away with me of, I'll be poor forever or no one's ever gonna hire me. They would look at me and with more confusion than like judgment.

certainly no agreement. And they're like, okay, that is not in reality anywhere, that that is what's gonna happen to you. When we have a tendency to catastrophize, right, if you can make something up, people naturally make up the worst case scenario. And my community would reflect back to me, it's like, okay, if you're gonna spend time thinking about you being homeless under a bridge,

Please also spend time imagining you getting a job that you love and having a really nice turnout to this event. And so both interrupting those intrusive thought cycles. And then when it got too much for me to handle in myself going to my community and saying, okay, this is what I'm thinking and having them check me and be like, you can't spend all your time on this side. You have to.

sometimes come back to the positive and imagine, because you're making it all up anyway, right? Whether it's death and doom or wonderful, you're making it up. So helping me direct me that way.

Rob Dwyer (11:09.669)
Yeah, right.

Rob Dwyer (11:17.861)
Yeah, I love the idea of, right, if you're caught in a moment of catastrophizing, changing the mindset and thinking about, well, what's the best possible outcome from this? Because that is a still a narrative that you create, but it's a narrative that you create with a very different result.

Since you took us to community, let's let's talk about that. Community is that is that my neighbors? What is that?

Rachel Williams (11:54.97)
That's an excellent question because it is a word that can be used in a lot of different ways. It can be physical community, your neighborhood, social community, people that you're like -minded with. But what I really mean when I'm thinking about building today my safety net for change tomorrow, it's two to three people that I feel safe enough to be honest with that when they ask me, what's going on with you?

I might start with I'm fine, but I'm going to be like, you're my safe place. Let me actually tell you what's going on. And that they have demonstrated compassion and empathy and vulnerability back to me so that I know that this isn't going to be a one -way street where they're collecting my secrets and I don't get to be that balance for them. Now, these relationships have to be built.

They don't just exist. They don't just, I mean, you might hit it off with somebody, but this level of support is not going to be immediate. So it can be like my sister is one of my community. So she's been with me my whole life. My husband is mine and that's because we've actively worked on being that person for each other. I mean, we spend so much time together. We know each other so we can sense it off of each other, but also being the safe place to.

hear the information. And there's a couple of things that we've done to establish that. One is when the other one launches into something, asking pretty quickly, what do you need? Are we just going to rage to like, are you mad and you want me to be mad with you so we can be mad together? do you want me to help you solve problems? Do you want me to agree that this situation sucks? And we're just going to agree on that.

Do you want me to tell you all the things I love about you because you don't want to be in this dark place and you want me to lift you out? And so it's, it is a thoughtful, small group of relationships that you are open to, that are open to you. And one of the other things you kind of have to remove out of it is needing them to be anything because sometimes, and even in those relationships, my sister and my husband both have been like, I'm not the one for this right now.

Rob Dwyer (14:19.045)
Mm -hmm.

Rachel Williams (14:19.29)
I need you to take this to someone else in your community. I also have almost always engaged with coaches or therapists and that can be, they're not going to give you themselves, but they can help you untangle the hair balls of emotion when you need it. So that's what I mean by community is where you know that there are places you can go that you're not going to have to mask or pretend like everything's okay.

Rob Dwyer (14:46.213)
Yeah.

Yeah. So what you're saying is the, you know, the followers on, on LinkedIn are not necessarily community, right? what you're, what you're digging into are those really close trusting relationships where you can be the real you. I love that you brought up someone in community who isn't necessarily that, that same kind of trusting relationship, like a coach or a therapist, because.

Having that outside, unbiased pair of eyes, if you will, to help you work through a problem can also be really useful, right? If your best friend or your sibling or your spouse is part of that community, they are a little biased, right? They're a little biased. They're in your corner, which is important. You need those people. You absolutely want people who are...

Rachel Williams (15:34.65)
Yes.

Rob Dwyer (15:48.037)
always going to be in your corner. But that outside person's role can be not necessarily to just be in your corner, but to help you, as you put it, untangle things. And that can be incredibly, incredibly useful.

Rachel Williams (16:09.338)
I have gotten immeasurable tools from the professionals that I have worked with over time. Kind of going back to the self -concept conversation, one of the tools that I've learned from a therapist was check the facts. So as example, you know, I, with my losing my job, I tied a lot of my overall security to...

my ability to earn money and became afraid when that particular piece of my day -to -day was taken away. And so she's checked the facts. And this connects into the financial stability piece of it, but the facts were my monthly budget that my husband and I have. It was what's in our savings. It was the fact that he has, you know, income coming in. And so,

being able to go to that person who wasn't just gonna say, we're fine, because we were, but helping me get there with, you know, check the facts, look for the evidence of what you're afraid of, that wouldn't have come from somebody that had that kind of both relationship, but somebody who's able to help me find my way through. So yeah, totally agree, super important.

Rob Dwyer (17:16.741)
Mm -hmm.

Rob Dwyer (17:30.181)
Yeah. Yeah. I love that you've segued into one of the other pillars, financial stability. I think this is for a lot of people, if they're facing a job loss, one of the big fears. And so let's talk about this pillar and how you can obviously being employed helps you with financial stability, but it's not the only thing that.

Rachel Williams (17:38.938)
Thank you.

Rob Dwyer (17:59.429)
gets you there. There are a lot of people who are gainfully employed and are not financially stable. So how do you go about doing that, managing that?

Rachel Williams (18:09.755)
Yeah. My husband and I followed a pretty direct path. So what I'd like to do is kind of just talk through the path that we took. And then if that feels too rigid or whatever, the things that people can take away to build a little more stability in. So we had some friends who had taken the Dave Ramsey financial freedom class and they were going to do another cycle and they invited us. And so it comes with a book and nine weekend.

Rob Dwyer (18:18.981)
Mm -hmm.

Rob Dwyer (18:27.173)
Yeah.

Rachel Williams (18:39.514)
session, meetings, or whatever, and you go and talk about the book. It's really got this fun, you know, whatever will go. So we did the class, in it you begin to create a budget, which takes about three months to get right, you know, because you're gonna miss things that you have for regular expenses, so we worked on our budget through that period. And it has a series of steps that you take to get to financial stability. So it involves having an emergency fund,

paying down debt, investing for your future, whether that's just retirement or your kids or home ownership or kind of all of those different things, but taking it in step. And so we did that and it took us two years and we paid off $72 ,000 in debt with a household income that was less than $72 ,000. We lived small, but we could see the end of it and we knew what that meant for us. And it...

Rob Dwyer (19:32.869)
Mmm.

Rachel Williams (19:37.754)
Then we built our emergency fund, which is what has created the additional stability now and investments, you know, as kind of a backstop for everything. And so that's a very, the Day -Brancy Plan is a very specific path. That's not the only way to get to financial stability. It's just the path that we took. But what we learned was when we first did our budget, we realized that,

The only reason we were still in the black was because of when the money hit. We actually weren't making enough to pay for what we were spending every month. And so that was a, I mean, we looked at the budget, we held hands and we kind of took a deep breath and we're like, this bad. But realizing it and seeing our true situation, I think that that step alone.

Rob Dwyer (20:12.805)
Mmm.

Rachel Williams (20:34.266)
creates financial stability because you found the evidence. You know either, yes, I'm making more than I'm spending or no, I'm not. And this, if something changes, I will be upended because I actually can't make it from month to month with what I'm earning. So just that knowledge, whether you do anything with it or not helps. Then as we began building savings, understanding that we could adopt a behavior that we didn't have before.

Rob Dwyer (20:38.629)
Hmm.

Rob Dwyer (20:47.429)
Yeah.

Rachel Williams (21:04.506)
because neither of us had been good at saving money. And so we learned that we could do that together. The debt one, I think is probably one of the most controversial steps that we took. But the thing that flipped my mindset about debt was if you pay with cash, you're paying with hours you've already worked. If you're paying with debt, you are signing up for future hours to work. And I was like,

Rob Dwyer (21:34.181)
Hehehehehe.

Rachel Williams (21:35.162)
I really would like to pay with hours I've already worked. I'd really not agreed to give whoever more of my future time. And so that helped us to really focus and make the sacrifices we needed for that two year period to pay it all off. And it was like car loans and student loans and credit card debt and all that kind of stuff. And the combination of knowing exactly what it takes for us to live every month for our budget and not having any debt.

means that when I stopped being able to earn money, nobody can take anything from us. Nobody's gonna come and take our car. Nobody's gonna come and take it from us. And I know the full range of employment opportunities that I can have because I only need to make the gap between what my husband makes and what we spend in a month. And so I'm not pressured. I was never pressured to stay in a job.

Rob Dwyer (22:24.069)
Mm -hmm.

Rachel Williams (22:31.002)
for a salary, there were pressure to stay in an apartment or a relationship for money because I knew what it was. And so the stability we've achieved is that we can live for a period of time without having income from a job. The bigger picture is I can make choices based on whatever life throws at me because I'm not tied up to not knowing what it cost me to live and having a bunch of debt.

That was a lot of we talk.

Rob Dwyer (23:00.693)
Yeah. No, you hit on a ton of important things, right? Part of it is just that flexibility, having some options. And right, I think most of us have at some point in our lives been in a situation where we didn't have options because we didn't have that stability. And it's work. That's the one thing that I heard from you over this journey.

is there's a lot of work toward it. There's a lot of sacrifice and it's not easy. I think, you know, all of us would like for it to just be easy and that we just get a bunch of money and we can pay off all of our bills and we're good. The reality is you need to work toward that to make it happen within specific constraints that are presented based off of

what your current household income is and figure out where you can make changes if the numbers don't add up at the end of the month.

Rob Dwyer (24:16.773)
Let's take a moment to get away from the money talk as important as it is and really go in a completely different direction with the pillar of physical well -being. What is that all about?

Rachel Williams (24:38.298)
So as I was coming through the phase, I really think I did a grief journey around this job because ups and downs in a roller coaster. And what I realized was I had established, because I needed the energy in the job to keep up, a daily movement routine. And so that was something that continued. I had my morning routine and it was part of it. I just kept doing that even though I didn't have a job to commute to.

Rob Dwyer (24:59.365)
Hmm.

Rachel Williams (25:08.794)
And so at the beginning, as I started thinking about it, it was whether that's walking or going to the gym or dancing, something that your body needs to do every day. And as I sat with this concept more, it's more than that. Part of it is physical wellbeing includes cleanliness. And if you're down in the dumps, you might not be bathing like you should. And so...

I mean, you just might be wearing the same lounge clothes and, you know, same outfit for several days. And so I started looking at the levels of showering. And this may not be the same for men, but for women, there are four levels of showering.

Rob Dwyer (25:39.589)
Yeah.

Rob Dwyer (25:55.461)
Wait, I'm excited to hear this. I did not know that.

Rachel Williams (25:59.834)
Yeah, so this is just as important to physical well -being as exercise, I think, when you're going through difficult changes. So the first one is the stinky bits, where you just get in and you put soap and water on the stinky bits. That's first level shower. The second is where it's a full body shower, but no hair. You don't wash your hair. The second is hair and body.

or third, I'm sorry, third is hair and body, because you're gonna have to do something with your wet hair at the end. So extra level of effort. And then level four showering is everything. So if you, hair removal, face mask, you know, all the things. And so when I have felt like, God, I don't want, you know, in the same...

sweatpants that I've been in for two days. I don't have it in me to do a level four shower, but I could do a level one or two. And so I get in committed to doing the level one, just the stinky bits. And then I feel it. Okay, well I'll just set up my whole body. And then I am caring for my body. My body is more than just a machine that carries my brain around. And so physical wellbeing includes that. It includes...

If you're stiff or sore, which I'm happily in my 40s and I'm waking up with cricks and creaks in the morning, addressing that and paying attention to what your body is needing from you, is asking for it. If you need to stretch or you need to pop your neck or something, being there. Because when you're going through change, it's so easy to get locked up in your head.

And you're abandoning 80 % of you physically. So it's such an important pillar that you're aware that you're cleaning and caring for and moving your body. And I found kind of going back to exercise that it was a way for me to process emotion when I didn't have the words for it. So I used an app called Couch to 5K. It's a progressive running or jogging.

Rob Dwyer (28:12.837)
Hmm.

Rachel Williams (28:21.178)
workout that's designed to get you to be able to run a 5k and was running and all of the things were going through my head about how unfair this was and how, you know, just I, whatever. And I started crying like a goof at the gym on the treadmill. My body was already processing that stuff and I'd given it an avenue to do it.

Rob Dwyer (28:45.829)
Mm -hmm.

Rachel Williams (28:50.17)
because I was already moving. And so physical wellbeing is critical to resilience because it is the energy and the facilitator of your experience. And so it's gotta be part of what you do every single day.

Rob Dwyer (28:52.549)
Yeah.

Rob Dwyer (29:13.093)
When you were just talking about that particular experience, it reminded me, I don't run today. I used to run. Thank you, Flatfeet and Badeneers from years of umpiring baseball. So I don't do a lot of running anymore. But when I did run, one of the things that I really enjoyed about it was it gave you space to think.

and or feel, right? It's not just about thinking. It can be processing things that you're going through. It can be thinking through next steps. It can be all kinds of different things can go through your head. And this goes a little bit with a conversation that I recently had when I guessed it on another.

podcast but I think far too often in today's world with our smartphones and their notifications and and always being on for some of us and we don't give ourselves enough time to just be with ourselves in a way that's that's productive where we can think and process and feel.

I know I've been guilty of that at times and that's the one thing that I love about that time of being able to just exercise is it does for me as long as I didn't have my music going. If I had my music going, that was a different story. But if I just allowed myself to just no music, just go out, just run, that was

Rachel Williams (31:00.026)
Right?

Rob Dwyer (31:07.396)
for me, my opportunity to just sit and think about things, to process things. And I think there's something to that.

physical activity that allows the mind to do its own thing as long as you don't have to focus too much on it. That's what I loved about the, I don't know, repetitive nature of running was I didn't have to actively think about it a whole heck of a lot. My mind could do other things while my body was going through these motions.

Rachel Williams (31:42.49)
Yeah, I think playing catch with my dad was always like when the best conversations happened because you were just free form, you know, you weren't, and I think for him too, I think he was more comfortable doing that. So yeah, there's something to doing. And another piece about it that was important for me is that I'm in control of the intensity. So if I, I still care for my body when I walk.

Rob Dwyer (31:51.333)
Yeah.

Rob Dwyer (32:04.453)
Mm -hmm.

Rachel Williams (32:11.226)
I still care for my body when I sit in my swim. Or one of the things I did, I love to dance and I live in a kind of rural area, so there aren't studios for adults. And so I bought an online dance class thing and because I was like, I wanted to use the space for something I really love. And so sometimes tapping into something you did as a kid.

Rob Dwyer (32:32.549)
Huh?

Rachel Williams (32:40.986)
with your body because I think so many of us were so much more active. You know, get a soccer ball or whatever it was that you did.

help bring that kind of joy back, I think is good.

Rob Dwyer (32:54.213)
Yeah. My wife, recently, helped my mom out because my mom was talking about exercise that she really liked doing. It turns out that Zumba is still available to stream. Don't have to have the DED. You can actually buy the program as a service. You can stream it. So, if you're looking for Zumba, as I understand it,

It's still out there. It's still, for those that enjoyed it, still just as enjoyable. So my best friend has talked about all kinds of YouTube videos that are out there for free as well. So if you're looking for just a quick workout that fits your intensity, one of the tips is to...

Rachel Williams (33:31.322)
Yeah.

Rob Dwyer (33:50.597)
Put in your search as you're searching for this kind of the level that you're looking for, right? So if you're Just beginning kind of a fitness journey. You can put beginner into your search and that will help find videos that are not as intense that are going to be more accessible for someone who maybe is not in the best shape and That also helps you

Rachel Williams (33:57.69)
Yeah.

Rob Dwyer (34:18.597)
continue through it as opposed to if you do something that's a little bit beyond kind of where you are, you're probably going to give up.

Rachel Williams (34:28.41)
Yeah, because you'll be super sore. And soreness is something I always tell myself on the first day is the worst it'll ever be as long as I keep moving.

Rob Dwyer (34:30.629)
Yeah.

Rob Dwyer (34:36.485)
Yeah, absolutely. Okay, so we've gone through four of these pillars, the self -concept, the community, financial stability, and physical well -being, but there is a fifth. Tell us about personal growth and development.

Rachel Williams (34:58.17)
So I have always been an avid reader. I like learning and I thought it was just part of my personality, but through this situation, I've realized that it's actually important to resilience because for me, continuing to read, I also, my husband and I have a subscription to masterclass, which is kind of segmented teachings by people who are experts in their field.

watching Ted talks and things like that. First of all, it reminds me that I'm smart. And when you have a change in life that maybe may make you question, were you really as good as you thought you were? Did you really have it in control? Like, were you really there? Knowing that you can continue to learn, that you can get concepts and apply them to your life can help.

be the proof that you need that, yeah, you're smart, you got this, you're not, you know, you can keep moving. Professional being a daily habit where you're kind of looking for some new approach to some thing generally or specifically is that you can have context for a situation that you might not have had before. So you would frame the situation that you've come out of differently if you...

we're exposed to a story about somebody who did it also. So if, you know, being in LinkedIn and seeing someone who'd also gotten unexpectedly let go and seeing them find a job, okay, now I've got a story arc that I can follow. And by seeking out those new pieces of information, by being open to learning, it keeps your mind fresh. It's kind of like what they tell you to do crosswords so that you don't get Alzheimer's when you get older.

Rob Dwyer (36:56.357)
Yeah.

Rachel Williams (36:56.922)
Personal growth and development is very much that same way, keeping you in the thread of conversation so that you can remember who you are and what you like and know that you're capable of growing even beyond whatever you're going through.

Rob Dwyer (37:11.525)
Yeah, I love that you mentioned some specific resources. I'll also throw out that there are free courses on LinkedIn learning. They're not all free, but there are courses that are free and accessible to everyone. And sometimes the things that are not free are free for a limited time. I've been recently introduced to what's called Maven, and they have

Kind of like master classes, but they're short, like 30 minutes, very focused on a specific topic. Those are online kind of live events that you can attend. And there's quite the collection. I don't think it's relatively new. I've attended a couple of them. And you brought up another incredible resource, which are TED Talks. And for those that are not aware,

Right. There's there's Ted, which is like the big production, but many communities have their own local version of that Ted X and they have their own websites where you can view Ted talks by people who are maybe closer to you, possibly even accessible to you.

And so if they've got a really incredible idea, you might be able to just actually talk to that person because they might be in your community, working in your community, or trying to implement that idea in your community. So I think that's another great resource for people who are looking for personal growth. And hey, if you've got a great idea, those TEDx groups are

always looking for people to craft a TED Talk for their events that are typically annual. And the way those work for people that are not familiar, like it's a workshop. There are volunteers that will help you build and craft that message around your idea, allow you time to practice, get feedback and...

Rob Dwyer (39:35.237)
Their goal is for you to have a really successful TED Talk, not, hey, this is all on you and go out there and hopefully don't fall on your face. That's not how it works.

Rachel Williams (39:46.65)
Yeah, I explored that because I was at an organization that sponsored a TEDx event and so I got to see it from an audience member and then I went and looked at their website.

Globally, it is expansive. I mean, there are thousands of those events. And I think, so seeing the TED Talks and the TEDx Talks, one, is brilliant for personal development. But just knowing that there are that many people focused on sharing great ideas can give you a lot of hope. Things are moving and ideas are being shared like they're supposed to be. And...

Rob Dwyer (40:05.253)
Yeah.

Rob Dwyer (40:22.437)
Mm -hmm.

Rachel Williams (40:29.914)
Yeah, that's a great, yes, absolutely. If somebody in your audience didn't know about that, I'm so glad you shared all of that because yeah, there's the big Ted, but there's also community -based and there's healthcare, there's university, TEDx, there are different kind of demographics around that. And so, yeah, yeah, they're amazing, amazing.

Rob Dwyer (40:39.909)
Mm -hmm.

Rob Dwyer (40:51.077)
Yeah, yeah, they really are. There are also, I'll just throw out there, there are also all kinds of different types of master classes that you may find within communities, not the kind of community that we've talked about today necessarily, but I'm involved in a few Slack communities and I know that those communities often have some type of whether it's,

They're just promoting a free masterclass that you can attend or they're actually organizing and sponsoring that as part of being part of the community. There are all kinds of things that you can attend and get involved with to continue along that path of personal growth and development at no cost, right? It's an investment of your time.

Those communities are often there as really just a service for their members. And it's all volunteer. It's all nonprofit. So shout out to CX Accelerator and Support Driven, two of my favorites. Are there any other resources that you can think of that maybe we haven't touched on that you'd like to give a shout out to?

Rachel Williams (42:17.818)
So I think one of the ones that has been most helpful for me is local book clubs. So the reason I like, I was talking to a number of three local in -person book clubs. They're all different. One of them is sponsored by a bookstore. It's pretty traditional, you know, what you think of like, like mature ladies, you know, reading historical fiction, like it's that book club.

Rob Dwyer (42:24.581)
Yeah.

Rachel Williams (42:46.01)
And then I have one that the stipulation is that you're under 30, not because the age matters, but because they read fantasy and, you know, they read different things that the other first book club probably would be into. And then I'm a member of a wine and book club where the focus is the wine, but we also read. So having those groups and the books that they select and of course it's all fiction. So it's not necessarily about.

Rob Dwyer (43:00.325)
Mm -hmm.

Rachel Williams (43:15.898)
learning a new approach to face the world or do at work, but it is exposure to different ways of thinking and ways of living. We recently read one called The Women by Kristin Hannah about the Army Nurse Corps in Vietnam for the United States military. Crazy perspective on what it was like to be in Vietnam, what it was like to be a woman, what it was like to come back.

And because it was such a foreign concept for women to be in combat zones that people here didn't believe them. And just the perspective of, so, you know, I married, my husband deployed three times. So, you know, I have a, like a, adjacent understanding of what that experience is like, but reading this book and then discussing it with women who were, you know, in society when all of that was happening and seeing it.

just grant such an appreciation and then building relationships across, you know, got my wine ladies, I've got my young ladies, I've got my mature ladies and building all those relationships. And then having an anchoring event to go to every month, you know, gives me something to look forward to. So I would say if you, even if you like to just listen to books, you don't have to physically read them. Find you a book club, it's worth it.

Rob Dwyer (44:41.061)
Mmm, I love it. Just a local group that meets around something specific can be an incredible resource The The wine and reading sounds good to me I don't know if I'm gonna choose the same books that your group is going to choose but Sure, we could work something out. I will also say your local library, right if you're looking for that

Rachel Williams (45:07.93)
Yes.

Rob Dwyer (45:09.701)
type of thing and you don't know where to go, start at your local library. Ask your local librarians if they know about any book clubs that you can join. And if you're concerned about the cost, a library is the most cost effective way to get a hold of those kinds of resources because...

It's already paid for. Your tax is already paid for. So just know. I think sometimes we forget in this on -demand world because we can get everything to us that libraries are an incredible resource in your community. And yeah, there may be a nominal fee to get your library card, but everything after that is free, 93 for the most part. It's my favorite price. So Rachel.

Rachel Williams (45:40.474)
Thank you.

Rachel Williams (46:04.506)
Yes, and I... go ahead. I was gonna say...

Rob Dwyer (46:08.677)
I was just gonna I was gonna ask you what else you had to share that we hadn't touched on.

Rachel Williams (46:19.354)
I think the biggest thing is that, like we said at the beginning, change is inevitable. Things are going to come into your life that you don't expect, that make you twist your head and look in a different direction. And a lot of times we'll think about what we're going to do. I know it professionally as a communicator, we've created crisis communications plans, made a big, beautiful binder and put them on a shelf.

And so when the crisis comes, everybody's looking for the binder. And I think that it doesn't have to be that way. And I'm so grateful that this journey has reflected back to me that there are simple daily habits and rituals that I just kept doing after I lost my job. And they've really been the anchoring thing that helped me. And if this can be...

a stepping point for exploration in any of your audience members lives if they just get curious about like, do I really believe that I'd be okay navigating any situation or do I know what my finances look like and they feel pretty stable or do I have those relationships where I can be open and honest and they could help me navigate? Am I listening to my body at all or is it just a machine that carries my brain around and am I learning and growing daily because that's what we're here to do?

You're going to be okay. You'll be fine. I'm not saying it's easy and I'm not saying it's going to be sunshine and roses every day. And I'm not going to say it doesn't suck sometimes because it does. But you're going to make it. And that's the important thing.

Rob Dwyer (48:02.821)
I love that. Rachel, thank you so much for joining Next in Q. I really appreciate it if people want to get in touch with you, we'll put your LinkedIn profile down in show notes so everyone can do that. Is there any other way that you would like people to reach out to you or is LinkedIn the best way?

Rachel Williams (48:24.122)
Sure, so designresilience .com is my website and the email address that works there is admin at designresilience .com and then from there there's contact form and all that kind of stuff. So whether it's through LinkedIn, which I'm active on, or through designresilience .com, I will meet you there.

Rob Dwyer (48:44.805)
Awesome, we will make sure the website is also in the show notes. Thank you so much for being here. I can't tell you how much I enjoyed it.

Rachel Williams (48:51.802)
Thank you. Me too. This was a wonderful conversation. I appreciate everything you're doing, Rob.